Chapter 3 - Adventures in Procrastination

I mean, this is getting a little ridiculous.

Somehow I’ve managed to paralyze not only my writing but also my “career”. Since making the decision to check out from Soul Crushing, Inc in the near future, I have mentally checked out on anything involving me doing actual work. Here’s a list of things I’ve done this week.

1. Tweeted videos, blogs, articles. I also followed a bunch of people so I don’t have to wait for my feed to update.
2. Blogged…once. (This counts as twice I suppose.)
3. Obsessively facebook stalked my kind-of boyfriend. (It’s that TOM. Biology says I have to.)
4. Started reading another Sarah Dessen novel while blow drying my hair. (I feel the need to always be multitasking. If I could hold a book and put on mascara at the same time, I would do it. Someone needs to invent that. Get on it, dreamers!)
5. Twirled my hair at my desk.
6. Googled dating advice websites and read every single goddamn article I can find on what it means to be exclusive but not necessarily in a relationship. (It’s that TOM. Biology says I have to.)
7. Made grocery lists, To Do lists, written down bills I need to pay. (I haven’t actually DONE any of the things I’ve written down, just planned to.)
8. Watched So You Think You Can Dance videos on YouTube and that one recently popular one floating around about an old guy in a nursing home hearing music he grew up with. Almost burst into tears when he started singing “I’ll Be Home For Christmas”. (It’s that TOM. Biology says I have to.)
9. Pretended to do work by frantically flipping between windows whenever my boss walks by. Did I mention we share an office? (This is one reason I can get away with blogging or writing. My typing sounds like I’m making progress on something I’m being paid for. Whoops!) 10. Thought about resurrecting my Tumblr but decided against it.

Things I need to do that I haven’t actually done much of this week?

1. Work.
2. Writing. I squeezed a thousand words out of the stone on Monday night, but since then, the 10 things above have kept me occupied.

There should be a study that looks at work productivity before and after the advent of Facebook. The business world must rue the day Mark Zuckerberg was born.